What a Team!

I married a wonderful woman. I love her so much and appreciate all of the things she does for me. I hope to write many more posts specifically about her and the sacrifices she makes for me and for our family. Tonight I am reminded about how I am grateful for the important things she worries about- that I hardly let cross my mind. I suppose we are a pretty good team, because there are many things I worry about, that probably don't ever cross her mind as well. For example- tonight Jamie is at her wits end trying to figure out what she is going to get Emma for her birthday- and trying to coordinate it so she gets something Emma really wants, but doesn't get something we don't want. In addition- she is already planning for next Christmas and what presents would be best to give now- or later, and how we are going to afford buying them. Jamie and I have both said- a hundred times, if it were up to me, we would be shopping the night before birthdays, and on Christmas Eve, like so many others do. I truly do no appreciate the time and effort that she puts into these decisions and how hard she works to get them something meaningful and make them feel special. The problem is- too often I take it for granted. It is about the last thing I want to worry about, and I am sorry to admit, that too often when she tries to talk to me about it- all I want to do is put it off. I think the real truth is that I trust her ability 100% over mine in the matter and I realize that anything I add or think is nothing that she has not already thought about and resolved. Unfortunately, it comes across as me not caring or appreciating what she is trying to do for our family. So tonight- as she is telling me all of the intricate details of what gifts to get for who and when to give them, all I am thinking about is how grateful I am for her taking the time and effort to figure it out- so I don't have to. Does she worry excessively about it all- absolutely. Am I grateful she does- definitely!

Jamie and gifts for the kids is only one example. Another example

involves clothing the children. I will freely admit that I don't like shopping for kids clothes. I have come to see it as a money pit that has gobbled up who knows how many thousands of dollars. The worst part is- every year, actually every season, you have to start all over again as the kids continue to grow. It requires endless coordinating, comparing, and shopping to find the right things for the right price. If it were up to me, I am certain we would find the right price, but I am less certain we would find the right things. Since it is not up to me, we always find the right things, and most of the time, the right price as well. This is not without considerable effort, however, but somehow Jamie has mastered the art of predicting the size of the children, what lines will be coming out and how they will coordinate, which lines will go on sale- and when- and how much, what items need to be bought now, and which can wait, and which stores are going to be the best place to buy it all so it will last to be passed down rather than fall apart after it goes thought the washer the first time. All of this is done a year in advance so that she can shop the clearance sales at the end of the season for clothes they will wear the next year. Again, trying to coordinate this all and find the money to pay for it all is far from my favorite thing to talk about, and generally it is quite evident in my attentiveness to the discussion- or lack thereof. However, I am truly grateful for my wife's concern and I reap the benefits every Sunday when we walk through the door and all of our children are in their matching and/or coordinating outfits and the compliments begin. As far as the price- always my biggest beef- well, all I can say is clothing kids defintely costs money. Jamie is always telling me the if I were to compare to what everyone else is spending I would see that what we spend is certainly not as astronomical as it seems, and is actually quite reasonable. As always- I am sure she is right.

I suppose we are different and bring different strengths and weaknesses for a reason. So the big question: is there any added value I bring? Who knows, but I do know that I spend plenty of time worrying about just as "silly" of things as gifts and clothes. Take car repairs and home/yard maintenance, for instance. Not very glamorous things to worry about, but things that need to be done which are often neglected. My most recent concern has been about the maintenance schedules of both of our cars. As far as the Acadia is concerned- it is a new car that I want to keep ship shape and running well. The Acura, on the other hand, is an older car that I want to keep running and avoid any major repairs if possible. To me that means keeping up to date on all of the maintenance. I am sure that Jamie agrees, but to her it means needless worrying, money, and hassle. Thank goodness for strengths and weaknesses. After more time that I want to admit, I have been able to read through all of the owners manuals and maintenance schedules and come up with a master plan for each car about what has been done, what needs to be done, and how often they need to be done to keep things running smoothly. As far as the price- well I too have research this and have compared prices at different shops vs the cost- in time and money- of doing it myself. In the past month I have had the Acadia's fuel system serviced, changed the oil in both of the cars, rotated the tires, and changed the transmission fluid in the Acura. All in all it looks like I have saved us close to $200. As for the time- I did it in my down time at work so as to not take time away from Jamie or the kids.
Could I have just taken the cars to the mechanic, allowed him to keep track of the maintenance schedules and paid out the nose to not have to worry about a thing. Probably. Could Jamie just shop on Christmas Eve and the week before birthdays at Toys-R-Us like everyone else, and buy all of the clothes in season at Jack and Janie (for the big bucks) or at Walmart (for cheap crap) and not spend so much time worrying. Yep. But we don't- and I am so thankful that I have a wife that thinks like me and worries about the things that I don't. What a team!